we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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