so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
I'm passing your future prison.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
I'm always down for nudity.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
