you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
Randomize
