i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
