Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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