I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
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