West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
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