I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Randomize