it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Randomize
