How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I'm at about main and main street
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
