did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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