David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize