some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
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