One girl and one boy is just not enough.
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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