I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
