I don't think brook has ever known best
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Randomize