That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Randomize
