butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
