Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
