he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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