just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
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