idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Randomize
