38 yer olds are good kisserssss
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
All I want is dick and wine.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
