He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
