dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
