i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Randomize
