i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
my liver is dry heaving
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Randomize
