D3 body, D1 cock
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I bet he comes in French.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
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