He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I'm at about main and main street
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Randomize