i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
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