This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
you guys were way drunker than both of me
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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