Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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