I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
I wear drunk well.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize
