your thong is hanging out like whoa
if you like me you must not know who I am
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
