The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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