worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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