so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Randomize
