a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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