I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Randomize