2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Randomize
