And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Randomize
