So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Randomize