I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Randomize
