ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
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