Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
If I die, sorry about rent.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
