I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Randomize
