also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
ugly people sure do ruin things
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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