Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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