i can't believe i had my finger in that
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
this just has baby written all over it
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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