I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize