Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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